the other woman
when a person cheats on their significant other. it always take TWO ppl.
I was a bit shocked when T had all this anger at L. And it wasn't until I pointed out to her that our friend was as much as part of the break up than L. Who's to say that he told L everything that was going on in his relationship. I don't think she was totally an innocent bystander...but there's more to the story. And this is why I can accept that our friend is still dating her.
Of course, he's our friend. So it's just easier to blame her as the 'homewrecker'.
when it comes to cheating... I think I'm more prone to get angrier at the person who is in the relationship rather than the person they are cheating with. Like if Dan was to cheat on me, of course, I wouldn't like the girl....but I would be totally disappointed in him because he knows the circumstances much better than the girl. He knows what he is doing. He should know how much he would be hurting me.
At a certain point in a relationship, you should instinctively know that what you are doing could potentially hurt your partner.
This is not in the realm of cheating... but since I told Dan straight out that I don't like him writing personal stories or 'mini-fantasy' stories to other ppl... that it hurts my feelings. He should now know instinctively that he shouldn't do that.
For me, I know when to NOT cross the lines with the opposite sex...it's when I know this will hurt Dan. When I flip the situation and put myself in his shoes. If he was to do this to me.. would I like it.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
When I have a kid.. that's the single most important line that I'm going to integrate into their head. Although there's a flipside to this... that being if the other person has a 'different' view of things compared to you. Like someone thinking fighting is a way to solve problems...and you don't view that as true. aiy. Things are complicated... and in the end.. hopefully just using common sense would work out.
FUCK!!!
I was a bit shocked when T had all this anger at L. And it wasn't until I pointed out to her that our friend was as much as part of the break up than L. Who's to say that he told L everything that was going on in his relationship. I don't think she was totally an innocent bystander...but there's more to the story. And this is why I can accept that our friend is still dating her.
Of course, he's our friend. So it's just easier to blame her as the 'homewrecker'.
when it comes to cheating... I think I'm more prone to get angrier at the person who is in the relationship rather than the person they are cheating with. Like if Dan was to cheat on me, of course, I wouldn't like the girl....but I would be totally disappointed in him because he knows the circumstances much better than the girl. He knows what he is doing. He should know how much he would be hurting me.
At a certain point in a relationship, you should instinctively know that what you are doing could potentially hurt your partner.
This is not in the realm of cheating... but since I told Dan straight out that I don't like him writing personal stories or 'mini-fantasy' stories to other ppl... that it hurts my feelings. He should now know instinctively that he shouldn't do that.
For me, I know when to NOT cross the lines with the opposite sex...it's when I know this will hurt Dan. When I flip the situation and put myself in his shoes. If he was to do this to me.. would I like it.
Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
When I have a kid.. that's the single most important line that I'm going to integrate into their head. Although there's a flipside to this... that being if the other person has a 'different' view of things compared to you. Like someone thinking fighting is a way to solve problems...and you don't view that as true. aiy. Things are complicated... and in the end.. hopefully just using common sense would work out.
FUCK!!!
posted by Lu at 12:30 AM
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